A Simple Guide to Understanding Why We Put Other Things First
We hear a lot about “idols” in life, but what does that really mean for regular people? An idol isn’t just a statue or something you worship in a temple. In daily life, an idol is anything—good or bad—that takes the place of what should be most important in your heart. It’s what you trust, depend on, or love more than anything else.
Where Do Our Idols Come From?
Let’s break down how “idols” form in us, in plain language:
· It’s a Mix of Personal, Cultural, and Spiritual Forces. Think of it like three streams combining into one river:
· Yourself (“the flesh”): We all have desires and weaknesses. Some call it our “heart” or “nature”—it’s like our inner factory that can keep pumping out new things to obsess over.
· Your Surroundings (“the world”): The people around you—your friends, family, culture, or even your social media feed—are always sending signals about what matters. Sometimes you copy others (even if you don’t realize it), or you rebel against them and pick something else just as strongly.
· Spiritual Influence (“the devil”): If you believe in spiritual things, there are forces that can push those desires to extremes, making you latch onto ideas or things in unhealthy ways.
Most of our habits, patterns, or struggles can’t be explained by just one thing. It’s not just your personality, your upbringing, or your choices. It’s all three, working together.
Two Layers: “Far” and “Near” Idols
Not all idols are obvious. Some are deep down, and some are right on the surface:
· Far Idols: These are basic, root desires—like wanting power, comfort, approval, or control. They’re not always easy to spot because they hide behind more specific things. But they’re what really drive you.
· Near Idols: These are the actual things or people you latch onto—like your job, your spouse, your bank account, or your success. Often, these are good things, but when you cling to them for your sense of worth or happiness, they become “idols.”
What’s tricky is that “far idols” use “near idols” as tools. For example, you might work overtime not just because you love your job—but because you crave approval or control. The solution isn’t always to quit your job or stop caring. It’s to put those things in the right place—enjoying them, but not needing them to prove your value.
The Trap of Idols: A Web of Delusions
Idols aren’t neutral—they mess with how you see the world. They create false standards for happiness, success, and failure. When you don’t get what your idol promises, you might feel an emptiness that you just can’t shake (like overwhelming guilt or despair).
If you ever wonder why you’re having a strong emotional reaction—like intense anger, fear, or sadness—it can help to ask: “Is there something deeper I think I need to have or be?” Sometimes, it’s not the situation itself, but an idol under the surface driving your response.
Examples of Personal Idols
Here are some everyday things that can turn into idols:
· Work: When work becomes your identity, you might only feel valuable if you’re productive or successful.
· Codependence: If you need to be needed, you may stay stuck in unhealthy relationships just to feel important.
· Beauty and Image: This could show up as constant worry about your looks, or even addictions to things that make you feel desired or admired. Sometimes, it’s not about sex at all, but about chasing the “perfect” relationship that will finally make you whole.
· Family: This could mean living for your children’s success, trying to please your parents at all costs, or making marriage your ultimate goal.
· Money: Whether you see money as security (hoarding it) or as your way to prove you matter (spending it), it can easily take center stage.
· Control: This may look like perfectionism, always needing everything just so, or anxiety when things are unpredictable.
Examples of Social and Cultural Idols
Idols aren’t always personal—they can be baked into our culture, too:
· Communism: Making the government (the state) the answer to everything.
· Populism: Basing everything on popular opinion, instead of deeper truths.
· Capitalism: Acting as if the free market and money are the keys to all life’s problems—even treating people like products.
· Humanism: Believing science and reason alone can solve everything.
· Individualism: Putting the freedom to do whatever you want above all else, no matter the cost to others.
· Traditionalism: Making family or tradition the highest good, even if it means ignoring individual needs.
Why Does This Matter?
Understanding your idols helps you make sense of your deepest struggles and motivations. It also means you can work on loving the people and things in your life in a healthier, freer way—appreciating them as good gifts, not as the foundation for your worth.
What Can You Do?
Notice the patterns. When you’re overwhelmingly upset or anxious, ask yourself: “What am I really afraid of losing? What do I think will finally make me happy or safe?” When you discover those answers, you’re on your way to understanding your idols—and you’re one step closer to real freedom and peace.
Minister A Francine Green
August 2025
afrancinegreen.com 