Reflecting Christ Through Kind and Gracious Conversation
Introduction: The Power of Words
Words are powerful. They can build bridges or burn them down, lift someone’s spirits or break a heart. If you’ve ever felt hurt by a harsh comment or encouraged by a kind one, you know firsthand the impact of what we say. The Bible doesn’t shy away from this truth—in fact, Scripture highlights the importance of our words often. But why does it matter so much? Because our speech reveals what’s in our hearts and shapes the world around us.
Scripture’s Strong Warning Against Toxic Speech
The Bible gives clear and strong warnings about the way we use our tongues. Ephesians 4:29 tells us, “Let no corrupting talk come out of your mouths, but only such as is good for building up, as fits the occasion, that it may give grace to those who hear.” This isn’t just a gentle suggestion—it’s a call to pay close attention to what we say and to use our words for good.
Colossians 4:6 encourages, “Let your speech always be gracious, seasoned with salt, so that you may know how you ought to answer each person.” In other words, our words should be filled with kindness and wisdom, making conversations better and more meaningful, not worse.
James 3:8 offers a sobering warning: “No human being can tame the tongue. It is a restless evil, full of deadly poison.” This verse reminds us how hard it is to control our speech and how destructive it can be if we’re not careful.
What to Avoid: Toxic Speech Defined
So, what kinds of speech does Scripture warn us against? Here are a few examples:
· Slander: Speaking falsely or unfairly about someone. Slander damages reputations and relationships.
· Malice: Words spoken with the intent to hurt or tear down others. Malice often comes from anger or resentment.
· Filthiness: Using crude, obscene, or inappropriate language. Such talk doesn’t bring honor to God or respect to others.
· Gossip: Sharing information about others that isn’t yours to share. Gossip can break trust and cause division.
· Bitterness and Criticism: Constantly complaining or finding fault. This can create a negative environment and discourage those around us.
The Tongue’s Destructive Power
Have you ever said something in anger and immediately wished you could take it back? Maybe it was a careless joke, a harsh criticism, or a rumor. James 3:8’s image of the tongue as “full of deadly poison” isn’t just poetic—it’s real life. A single word can end a friendship, damage someone’s confidence, or create lasting wounds. On the other hand, the right word at the right moment can heal, encourage, and restore.
Most of us have experienced both sides—the pain of harsh words and the joy of kind ones. That’s why Scripture calls us to take our speech seriously.
Speech as a Mark of Wisdom and Love
The way we speak shows what’s in our hearts. When we choose words that are gracious, gentle, and full of encouragement, we reflect God’s wisdom and Christ’s love. Kind speech isn’t just “being nice”—it’s a spiritual practice, a sign that God is at work in us.
Following Jesus means following His example, and Jesus was known for His compassion, truthfulness, and ability to speak life into the lives of others. When our words are “seasoned with salt,” as Colossians says, we bring flavor and goodness into every conversation.
Practical Application: Speaking Life Every Day
What does it look like to put these principles into practice? Here are a few simple, everyday steps:
· Pause Before You Speak: Take a breath and consider your words. Will they build up or tear down? If you’re upset, give yourself time to cool off before responding.
· Speak Gracefully: Choose words that offer kindness, encouragement, and understanding. Even when you need to address a problem, do it with respect.
· Encourage Others: Be intentional about pointing out what’s good in people. A simple “I appreciate you” or “You did a great job” can make someone’s day.
· Avoid Gossip and Slander: If you’re not part of the problem or solution, it’s usually best not to share information about others.
· Pray for Guidance: Ask God to help you use your words wisely and to make your speech a source of life and blessing.
Conclusion: Rooted in Christ’s Example
Our words matter. They can hurt or heal, discourage or inspire. As believers, we’re called to follow Christ’s example—to speak with kindness, grace, and love. Let’s make it our goal to use words that build up, offer grace, and reflect the character of Jesus. In doing so, we’ll not only strengthen our relationships but also shine God’s light into the world, one conversation at a time.
Minister A Francine Green
December 2025
afrancinegreen.com 